So often, so many crazy thoughts buble up in my mind that I feel, so much, sujectivly confused.... The other day I was thinking, -if I got selected for Heaven next life, how it would be my next life there.
I was in U.S.A for about sixteen years and had been in Washinton DC several times. Everyone is neither invited nor allowed in PREIDENT'S HOUSE (even if you are a U.S.A -Citizen) Or, even if you live in there. In Washington DC, there are other places including 'DOWN TOWN' and other areas too and they are not deserted places but full of residents.
So, I was thinking or was trying to guess the space I would be alloted if I get a selection - grade for my next posting, in heaven. Maybe , I have to find it out from GOOGLE,com , the pattern of Heaven!
Friday, October 29, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
MY POEM
YOU
(From Album of International Poets)
Like well- conceived plot of a play
harmoniously knit
if I could get ,only,- a few moments
strung into a wreath !
scarecely have I said this to my mind ---
when, - you step in
dressed in gorgeous red and gold
bringing with you
the aroma of the summer eve
now cooling down !
The Earth is not a watermelon --juicy
we have gathered this from our experiences past
never-the less somewhere deep in you
there is a softness balmy offering solace
And if I chance to laugh it away
and call it an effect of
skilful setting of nerves
the dicovery of sciece ---
You cut short my loquacity'
As it grows darker
the stars shine brighter
and the vast void reveals the Cosmic wonder
of the Universe !
This perception alone is a fountain-head
of many a melodious tune ---when
dressed in gorgeous red and gold
you step in
bringing with you the redolence sweet
0f evening serene
and sit by me with an air of intimacy
eager to communicate.
(Translated from the Bengali poem of Phani Basu
by Umanath Bhattacharya)
( First Edition. 1981
Tagore Institute of Creative writing International, Madras-600090, India.)
(From Album of International Poets)
Like well- conceived plot of a play
harmoniously knit
if I could get ,only,- a few moments
strung into a wreath !
scarecely have I said this to my mind ---
when, - you step in
dressed in gorgeous red and gold
bringing with you
the aroma of the summer eve
now cooling down !
The Earth is not a watermelon --juicy
we have gathered this from our experiences past
never-the less somewhere deep in you
there is a softness balmy offering solace
And if I chance to laugh it away
and call it an effect of
skilful setting of nerves
the dicovery of sciece ---
You cut short my loquacity'
As it grows darker
the stars shine brighter
and the vast void reveals the Cosmic wonder
of the Universe !
This perception alone is a fountain-head
of many a melodious tune ---when
dressed in gorgeous red and gold
you step in
bringing with you the redolence sweet
0f evening serene
and sit by me with an air of intimacy
eager to communicate.
(Translated from the Bengali poem of Phani Basu
by Umanath Bhattacharya)
( First Edition. 1981
Tagore Institute of Creative writing International, Madras-600090, India.)
TRANSPOSITION
Once I had endless desires and no means
To day I have enough wealth yet very few desires
even though, within my reach, to fullfil !
To day I have enough wealth yet very few desires
even though, within my reach, to fullfil !
Sunday, October 24, 2010
REMINISCENCE II
In those early days of my youthand doing house job in Irwin hospital, with my rural back ground and un-smart poise to be-friend smrt colleagues of mine and often shy before nurses , I woud run back to Gole Market and spend hours in great Eastern Stores on a corner of the counter observing and admiring the way Raj baalv kept even the high Executive clients charmed with his gifted taent of public -speaking. And I was even jeaous !, I was very good in righting , even engish, but as in student ife had no chance in sharpening my oratorial capacity, i was a tongue tied boy by any standard, And this Rajbalav , to my joyous surprise , was so fluent and without even a school certificate and coud speat i hindi , punjabi , Engish (without respecting Gramatical discipline) and keep them ever so magnetised that even deputy secretaries of those would seek only him for their purchase deal. Whie I , a medica graduate and a proud house surgeon of a top Delhi Hospita even used to fumbe and stamer before the bus-coductor in seecting and arranging my expression in hindi or even in English when the conductor fired on english words, all wrong , or hindi/ punjabi which were even, more 'greek' to me.
I come back to my Rajballav Mama again He had a shortthick feature , squreface, very fare and handsome face but when he fced you and smiled broad, I think even and enemy panning to hurt him would drop his weapon and embrace him. That was the personality of RAJBALLAV and I wish so much that he was even now with us or at least me.
I come back to my Rajballav Mama again He had a shortthick feature , squreface, very fare and handsome face but when he fced you and smiled broad, I think even and enemy panning to hurt him would drop his weapon and embrace him. That was the personality of RAJBALLAV and I wish so much that he was even now with us or at least me.
OTHER PIECES FROM MY YOUNG LIFE
Tod enough times of my romantic dreams and growing 'waves' of my young life. But the tale is not well framed til I frame the tale about 'Rajbalav' whom I shall introduce here as 'Mama'( Maternal unce0. No - he was not reated to me in any social connection.He was just a sales-man in a shop - GreatEasten Stores - oanLady Hadinge road , Gole Market, New dehi and I was living in Basu Boarding House , just opposite the shop , in those days between 1955 & 1960, during my house job in IRWIN HOSPITAL and subsequent fob as a Gazetted Medical officer under DELHI Administration.
I can not foget Rajballav - Mama and I shall not. I am now an octogenarian and have not seen ony one,( even flying manytimes to U.S.A and visiting even RUSSIA (Old USSR)and even becoming an U.S.A Citizen) who could smie so brad , asif his heart was dancing between is lips, and winning over even his worst client on the counter.
He was about 5-6 yrs older than me and yet my ony friend , those days. He was marrid and i so oftened accompanied him to his rented space in Pahar ganj . he had his old mother with him and she loved me as if I was her son too in this or some other birth. Mami -(eajballav's wife was a sweet hearted ady without any school certificate but carying abundant inherited culture to match any modern up-growth.Theirs was the real home for me foe those 4-5 years when I was the loney person in my father's Boarding house and away from my root( my mother and and sibing0and aso unmarried. But I shall need more space to tel about this Rajbalave Mama(contd)
I can not foget Rajballav - Mama and I shall not. I am now an octogenarian and have not seen ony one,( even flying manytimes to U.S.A and visiting even RUSSIA (Old USSR)and even becoming an U.S.A Citizen) who could smie so brad , asif his heart was dancing between is lips, and winning over even his worst client on the counter.
He was about 5-6 yrs older than me and yet my ony friend , those days. He was marrid and i so oftened accompanied him to his rented space in Pahar ganj . he had his old mother with him and she loved me as if I was her son too in this or some other birth. Mami -(eajballav's wife was a sweet hearted ady without any school certificate but carying abundant inherited culture to match any modern up-growth.Theirs was the real home for me foe those 4-5 years when I was the loney person in my father's Boarding house and away from my root( my mother and and sibing0and aso unmarried. But I shall need more space to tel about this Rajbalave Mama(contd)
CRAZY THOUGHTS !
THOUGHTS HAUNTING ME :
Thoughts haunting me for long ! Maybe, they are crazy thoughts but they haunt me so frequently that I coud not stop recording them now .
Does the GRAND DESIGNER have a Belly - Button ? Maybe only Stephen Hawking has the answer locked inside his huge brain. Or maybe, even , he does not know it . It is even beyond Giant Computer 's lock & Key !
Next is , - while in U.S.A and approaching the Statue Of Liberty, more than once during my long long iving there , I was always wondering - looking at that huge Statue , is ' Liberty' also a female or male or something otherwise ? Since I have been brooding over it and now , I think, I must surf GOOGlE, sometimes and find out the story of this 'Master- Buiding' and trace the root from the Artist or Builder.
Of course Crazy thoughts can germinate anywhen from anywhere.
Thoughts haunting me for long ! Maybe, they are crazy thoughts but they haunt me so frequently that I coud not stop recording them now .
Does the GRAND DESIGNER have a Belly - Button ? Maybe only Stephen Hawking has the answer locked inside his huge brain. Or maybe, even , he does not know it . It is even beyond Giant Computer 's lock & Key !
Next is , - while in U.S.A and approaching the Statue Of Liberty, more than once during my long long iving there , I was always wondering - looking at that huge Statue , is ' Liberty' also a female or male or something otherwise ? Since I have been brooding over it and now , I think, I must surf GOOGlE, sometimes and find out the story of this 'Master- Buiding' and trace the root from the Artist or Builder.
Of course Crazy thoughts can germinate anywhen from anywhere.
LOSS AND GAIN & THE ROOT !
( Theory of Back -ground Relativity)
Some where I read it . Wish I could remember the source. The event is like as folows :
A mother with her teen -age daughter went to sea-beach on western coast of U.S.A (maybe, Los angeles).... A kiler Shark came and took the girl in her Jaw .... An ameteur Photographer happened , just then on the spot, took a smart shot of the event and CNN bought the Picture from the Photographer for a milion dolars . .....
Now it so happened both,- the victims of that event and the lucky photographer lived on the same Sky -scrpper building , one foor above the other. Within a week , while the mother was mourning the loss of her daughter on the lowere floor , the young photographer was celebrating a grand party of winning a milion dollar for his rare feat on the upper floor with great illumination and festive party. And yet both the events had the single root - the tragic Death of a girl !.....
Resting on the bank of the river Ganges in Konnagar of Bengal, with the waves dancing near and far , this event just jumped in on my mind - don't know how or why !
Some where I read it . Wish I could remember the source. The event is like as folows :
A mother with her teen -age daughter went to sea-beach on western coast of U.S.A (maybe, Los angeles).... A kiler Shark came and took the girl in her Jaw .... An ameteur Photographer happened , just then on the spot, took a smart shot of the event and CNN bought the Picture from the Photographer for a milion dolars . .....
Now it so happened both,- the victims of that event and the lucky photographer lived on the same Sky -scrpper building , one foor above the other. Within a week , while the mother was mourning the loss of her daughter on the lowere floor , the young photographer was celebrating a grand party of winning a milion dollar for his rare feat on the upper floor with great illumination and festive party. And yet both the events had the single root - the tragic Death of a girl !.....
Resting on the bank of the river Ganges in Konnagar of Bengal, with the waves dancing near and far , this event just jumped in on my mind - don't know how or why !
MY HAPPIEST CREATIVE JOY ! _II
Next part I shall rather offer to my readers through his( Umanath Bhattacharya )own published article, afterwards.
" Of Phani Basu. I confess, I had no knowledge at all. Who was he, what he was, what place he hails from-indeed all information about the man and his whereabouts was , until the other day . unknown to me..
Then happened the historic event.One fine morning in october 1977 after finishing the translation pf a poem of phani Basu that appeared in the Puja number of 'Samayanug' of the year I was absorbed in reciting it with verve as was my wont, when to my pleasant surprise,, Sri Deb Kumar Basu, the Editor of SAMAYNUG and the head of the well known publishing House , Vishwa Jnyan,Calcutta, stepped in and announced himsef. with him ws a gentleman with soft feature and an artistic aroma about him.When Debkumar introduced his com panion as his friend named Dr. Phani Basu M.D., I jumped to my feet with excitement and exclaimed - is he by any chance a poet also ?"
As my editor friend nodded affirmativey and the poet looked on, I spread before his view the transation of a romantic piece of his " Ami - Tari - Pakhi'( I am her bird) just completed and the ink was not dry til then. Presently ,I embraced him warmy and called him brother poet.
The effect ws tremendously dramatic.Whoever dreamt that the poet would come and grace my study and discover his own poem translated on that very hour of the historic day of uur first meeting ?"
By Umanath Bhattacharya, ; S-V 49, R.K. Puram, New Dehi -110 -022 ( Published in a Local Brochure).( Concluded)
" Of Phani Basu. I confess, I had no knowledge at all. Who was he, what he was, what place he hails from-indeed all information about the man and his whereabouts was , until the other day . unknown to me..
Then happened the historic event.One fine morning in october 1977 after finishing the translation pf a poem of phani Basu that appeared in the Puja number of 'Samayanug' of the year I was absorbed in reciting it with verve as was my wont, when to my pleasant surprise,, Sri Deb Kumar Basu, the Editor of SAMAYNUG and the head of the well known publishing House , Vishwa Jnyan,Calcutta, stepped in and announced himsef. with him ws a gentleman with soft feature and an artistic aroma about him.When Debkumar introduced his com panion as his friend named Dr. Phani Basu M.D., I jumped to my feet with excitement and exclaimed - is he by any chance a poet also ?"
As my editor friend nodded affirmativey and the poet looked on, I spread before his view the transation of a romantic piece of his " Ami - Tari - Pakhi'( I am her bird) just completed and the ink was not dry til then. Presently ,I embraced him warmy and called him brother poet.
The effect ws tremendously dramatic.Whoever dreamt that the poet would come and grace my study and discover his own poem translated on that very hour of the historic day of uur first meeting ?"
By Umanath Bhattacharya, ; S-V 49, R.K. Puram, New Dehi -110 -022 ( Published in a Local Brochure).( Concluded)
Saturday, October 23, 2010
MY HAPPIEST CREATIVE JOY
MY THOUGHTS MY POEMS : REMINISCENCE
It was !978 I was persuing my profession in medical service as a Specialist in Safgarjaang Hospita, Dehi and also my passion , like addiction in ppetry and Visua Art ( Waste-wood Scupture ) almost with same intensity.
then on day my friend and pubisher , Debkumar Basu of Vishwajnyan, Cacutta came and requested my company for a vist certain schoar and Write Umanath Bhattacharya )r and I agreed . We both , in my car , droved to Ramakrishnapuram Sector -v and his flat . On the way , Debkumar tod me a lot about him and that he was a self-made scolar in Sanakrit, Bengai , Engish and a poet too(in Engish) and one of the two best translator of Indian literature into Engish ( the other one ila Roy. As until then i had noe of my poems transated and I did not Know .
Deb kumar stroked on the woodwn door and adding up his characteristic Voice -Keu aachhen "( is there any body). Aand the door opened by a tall , slim , sharp-featured brahmin( he was bare above the waste an the sared thred betraying his high caste was evident. We were welcomed in cordialy .On the foor there was a matress spread out with ots of fuulscap papers and some of them filed up in writing. two or three pens were waiting around. HAfter requesting us to take our seats on the wooden cot , he made himsef seated in the matress and both the grand old man ( he was 78 yrs then) and Debkumar , my pubisher exchanged wecome greeting and a few other words .Now my pubisher took the oppotunity to introduce me to him teing - Sir, meet My friend Dr. P. Basu who brought me to you. I was all thetime scanning this old man-scholar. his eyes and look was so sharp ( wasnot wearing any gass) and with Socrtic simplicity and some magnaetic aura around him. He was aso studying my feature and told ' you are Dr, Basu of Delhi ? then you may not be. I learnt about one Basu of Delhi -- then suddeny he asked " your full name please. " Phani Basu ' - i replied. and he amist jumped up disobeying his age and chalenge 'you write Poetry..... A the time deb kumar , in his characteristic way ( he was once an actor and disciple of SHiSHIR BHADURY) was lauging soft and told me - Phani Dhara poret gachho ( Phani you are caught). I took the opportunity and admitted that i was that phani basu who writes poems too' . He came forward and embraced me and sang out loud - ' it must be providence ! My ord ! . See I was just transating one of your poems from a Calcutta periodica and see, the ink is not even dry."
Suddenly I was , as if ifted to a higher pane and was almost foating. Can it bre true ? can it be real ! that I have been trans ported to a plane where a an od Scolarly gentleman, amost 30 years older and wiser than me and whom i have never known or seen before , was translating my poem , hust when i was there. I sttod almost motion less and without breath for sone seconds and with foded hands saluted him and felt as if , even Rabindranath would have envied my good uck and the reward I received. (contd)
It was !978 I was persuing my profession in medical service as a Specialist in Safgarjaang Hospita, Dehi and also my passion , like addiction in ppetry and Visua Art ( Waste-wood Scupture ) almost with same intensity.
then on day my friend and pubisher , Debkumar Basu of Vishwajnyan, Cacutta came and requested my company for a vist certain schoar and Write Umanath Bhattacharya )r and I agreed . We both , in my car , droved to Ramakrishnapuram Sector -v and his flat . On the way , Debkumar tod me a lot about him and that he was a self-made scolar in Sanakrit, Bengai , Engish and a poet too(in Engish) and one of the two best translator of Indian literature into Engish ( the other one ila Roy. As until then i had noe of my poems transated and I did not Know .
Deb kumar stroked on the woodwn door and adding up his characteristic Voice -Keu aachhen "( is there any body). Aand the door opened by a tall , slim , sharp-featured brahmin( he was bare above the waste an the sared thred betraying his high caste was evident. We were welcomed in cordialy .On the foor there was a matress spread out with ots of fuulscap papers and some of them filed up in writing. two or three pens were waiting around. HAfter requesting us to take our seats on the wooden cot , he made himsef seated in the matress and both the grand old man ( he was 78 yrs then) and Debkumar , my pubisher exchanged wecome greeting and a few other words .Now my pubisher took the oppotunity to introduce me to him teing - Sir, meet My friend Dr. P. Basu who brought me to you. I was all thetime scanning this old man-scholar. his eyes and look was so sharp ( wasnot wearing any gass) and with Socrtic simplicity and some magnaetic aura around him. He was aso studying my feature and told ' you are Dr, Basu of Delhi ? then you may not be. I learnt about one Basu of Delhi -- then suddeny he asked " your full name please. " Phani Basu ' - i replied. and he amist jumped up disobeying his age and chalenge 'you write Poetry..... A the time deb kumar , in his characteristic way ( he was once an actor and disciple of SHiSHIR BHADURY) was lauging soft and told me - Phani Dhara poret gachho ( Phani you are caught). I took the opportunity and admitted that i was that phani basu who writes poems too' . He came forward and embraced me and sang out loud - ' it must be providence ! My ord ! . See I was just transating one of your poems from a Calcutta periodica and see, the ink is not even dry."
Suddenly I was , as if ifted to a higher pane and was almost foating. Can it bre true ? can it be real ! that I have been trans ported to a plane where a an od Scolarly gentleman, amost 30 years older and wiser than me and whom i have never known or seen before , was translating my poem , hust when i was there. I sttod almost motion less and without breath for sone seconds and with foded hands saluted him and felt as if , even Rabindranath would have envied my good uck and the reward I received. (contd)
Friday, October 22, 2010
REMINISCENCE ( AUTOBIOGRAPHY)
DON"T NO WHY ? Don't know why God chose me for giving a good memory ! Really I don't know . ! But even to day at the age of past 80 I can rememeber events , or almost visualise them as if they happenened yesterday. As if I am covering 'SPACE-TIME' in ' Time Machine " of H.G Wells. Now I am in Konnagar of West Bengal, and residing on a flat on the very bank of hoogly river , as if, the Divine has retrieved my chid -hood dream .Even more, the memory of Medical College -life is reconstructed by pre-destination and the fact that one of my college mate is the owner of the land where I have taken my shelter( won't betray her name -without sanction0). Any way ,the reminiscence begin from here. Almost a year back this colege-mate held a re-union of her classmates( she is one year junior to me) and I was also invited .I enjoyed the party and they liked my presence and also homoured by visiting the Art-Gallery of mine ( My Art Works ) on the same building.
Now in my earlier memoir (Autobiography ) I told about my boy -hood dream and of the girl - (some Dutta Roy) whom I qualified as the ' Queen-Bee" of the college and my Cinderella -dreams.As by pre-destination Jyoti of tteir grpup, who is now in Canada and who came to India and honoured this get-together , told me that -Dutta roy was now in Hyedrabad and he was going to visit her this time. Like some 'dimensional -jump' and time Machine -Play the whole picture of my college life 'played back' on the mental Screen. With all regards for Mark Twain, I have aready admitted in my early depiction.. But before I voyage to my next experience, I just give a quick similie from the great short story of Maupassant : There the dreamer boy , dreaming of his earler love (with seperation and loss of many years )- re-visited the villege to meet the loved-one , found a fat lady driving her herd of sheeps , identified her to be her Dream- girl and then managed to jump back to the waiting train without betraying his own indentity to the fat lady ( his one-time lover).
My Experience in life almost matched this great writer's story in another way: After being told about this 'Queen-bee' ( I was given her Mobile number even) , one day I dialed her number and got her on the Phone. I was still carrying my Cinderela -memory within and her wish of learning drawing from me.. I was so sure that my name and face must me dazzling bright in her memory. On phone she was very nice and polite and as sweet in her manners as before . But, oh Lord ! she could neither remember my name nor the identity of that famous Artist ( my self) of Pibis's Weekly -fame ! ( I was lost to her like a dropped bus-ticket). I felt Crest fallen ! So sure was I about my bright image and shining self in her mind , if not life ! Now it was a real ' Reaity - Show' - that day! I with my vivid memory of those days tried to Console mysef that with almost 80 yrs on her shoulder she must be like an 'Alzhimer' now ( and with more than 80 yrs I was still carrying the old bag of boy-hood memory !. Any way , thetalk on telephone stopped soon with ritualistic 'Thanks' and the shocking gap of a gulf-time , ever widening. I now think, Maupassan t would have envied my experience and would have liked to be born again to write another short story for the World .
Now in my earlier memoir (Autobiography ) I told about my boy -hood dream and of the girl - (some Dutta Roy) whom I qualified as the ' Queen-Bee" of the college and my Cinderella -dreams.As by pre-destination Jyoti of tteir grpup, who is now in Canada and who came to India and honoured this get-together , told me that -Dutta roy was now in Hyedrabad and he was going to visit her this time. Like some 'dimensional -jump' and time Machine -Play the whole picture of my college life 'played back' on the mental Screen. With all regards for Mark Twain, I have aready admitted in my early depiction.. But before I voyage to my next experience, I just give a quick similie from the great short story of Maupassant : There the dreamer boy , dreaming of his earler love (with seperation and loss of many years )- re-visited the villege to meet the loved-one , found a fat lady driving her herd of sheeps , identified her to be her Dream- girl and then managed to jump back to the waiting train without betraying his own indentity to the fat lady ( his one-time lover).
My Experience in life almost matched this great writer's story in another way: After being told about this 'Queen-bee' ( I was given her Mobile number even) , one day I dialed her number and got her on the Phone. I was still carrying my Cinderela -memory within and her wish of learning drawing from me.. I was so sure that my name and face must me dazzling bright in her memory. On phone she was very nice and polite and as sweet in her manners as before . But, oh Lord ! she could neither remember my name nor the identity of that famous Artist ( my self) of Pibis's Weekly -fame ! ( I was lost to her like a dropped bus-ticket). I felt Crest fallen ! So sure was I about my bright image and shining self in her mind , if not life ! Now it was a real ' Reaity - Show' - that day! I with my vivid memory of those days tried to Console mysef that with almost 80 yrs on her shoulder she must be like an 'Alzhimer' now ( and with more than 80 yrs I was still carrying the old bag of boy-hood memory !. Any way , thetalk on telephone stopped soon with ritualistic 'Thanks' and the shocking gap of a gulf-time , ever widening. I now think, Maupassan t would have envied my experience and would have liked to be born again to write another short story for the World .
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
MY THOUGHTS IN RETROSPECT
" THE PARENTS were once born as Chilidren
the chidren ,in return, then parents -are
Neither the children are greater than Parens
nor the Parents better than their children, -were."
( From the Mytologic PLAY - 'JAJATI ' by Parashar [ Phani Basu ; written and staged in 1965,on New Delhi Kali Bari Stage)
the chidren ,in return, then parents -are
Neither the children are greater than Parens
nor the Parents better than their children, -were."
( From the Mytologic PLAY - 'JAJATI ' by Parashar [ Phani Basu ; written and staged in 1965,on New Delhi Kali Bari Stage)
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
THE BUBLE THOUGHTS
If this Baby Or Adult Civillisation ( or whatever it claims itself to be) can discover the 'Recycling' process which is an In-built Quality of NATURE since the onset of this BIG-BANG ( our Universe is only a sibling of myriad Bangs) then , -I repeat - then, why the First DESIGNER or DIVINE could not INDUCE the process of 'RE-INCARNATION' in the LIVING-PROCESS of CONSCIOUS BIOOGICAL UNIVERSE ?
Of course , As my teacher ( in Medical College) taught in his unique way that ; 'Common sense is the Rarest Sense and never so common, nost often ,even, amongst Scholars and Scientists'.
Of course , As my teacher ( in Medical College) taught in his unique way that ; 'Common sense is the Rarest Sense and never so common, nost often ,even, amongst Scholars and Scientists'.
TO ABDULLAH
In the field of Duality
Sun makes the Night
and shadows too
as objects are too, the product of SUN
or energy frozen from lazy light.
The stars and the SUN
all children of CONSCIOUS LIGHT
not to be seen but to be Known
which is the ONE
may give any name
it matters - not .
Sun makes the Night
and shadows too
as objects are too, the product of SUN
or energy frozen from lazy light.
The stars and the SUN
all children of CONSCIOUS LIGHT
not to be seen but to be Known
which is the ONE
may give any name
it matters - not .
Saturday, October 16, 2010
BUTTERFLY
TRAPPED COCOON
I siffocate myself and almost swoon
trapped within -the wretched cocoon !
This salivating hope of silky dream
this desire ,lust or growing greed
and sticky froth or cementing seal
has encaged me whole and within !
I must decide now -even if late
discriminate here,- sharp and smart
try to come out of en-trapped state
to free finally my soul and heart
Trapped in cocoon the butterfly cry
for cerulean sky and wants to fly.
(october 14, 1996)
I siffocate myself and almost swoon
trapped within -the wretched cocoon !
This salivating hope of silky dream
this desire ,lust or growing greed
and sticky froth or cementing seal
has encaged me whole and within !
I must decide now -even if late
discriminate here,- sharp and smart
try to come out of en-trapped state
to free finally my soul and heart
Trapped in cocoon the butterfly cry
for cerulean sky and wants to fly.
(october 14, 1996)
Saturday, October 9, 2010
FAULTS IN A GENIUS
That is the fault in Great Genius ! I mean , though they may be as ordinary as ourselves in some of or most most other fields of Material living , yet in their own special Field, they are in-capable of committing mistakes 99 percent times out of hundred .Take the case of the puzzling Genius of EINSTEIN himself. In his early life he had to work in a patent office and could not get selected for a little better post (know from his own writings ). He could not even manage a happy family life and had a divorce to his record in married ife.
Yet and even when he had to admit and later, he declared his 'Cosmological Constant' as the' biggest Blunder ' in his life , that same 'blunder' was re-discovered by later Scientific World, as the Biggest Truth to meet the Cosmoogical 'Revelations' of later Time.
That is why I feel confident when i say that the fault of Great genius is that they usually can not even commit ordinary mistakes in their own field of SEARCH . Just as we , the ordinary people are in-capable of being correct in our rotine works without ,many times, being wrong !
Yet and even when he had to admit and later, he declared his 'Cosmological Constant' as the' biggest Blunder ' in his life , that same 'blunder' was re-discovered by later Scientific World, as the Biggest Truth to meet the Cosmoogical 'Revelations' of later Time.
That is why I feel confident when i say that the fault of Great genius is that they usually can not even commit ordinary mistakes in their own field of SEARCH . Just as we , the ordinary people are in-capable of being correct in our rotine works without ,many times, being wrong !
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
AUTOBIOGRAPHY - XXVIII
So , now it was like a 'twice -born life of Hindu -faith in brahmin family'. And I was so busy in building my image that I neglected my studies and skipped the second year final exam., which I cleared in my next chance i.e six months after.
I shall never forget my Five year M,B.B.S -course life.When I found that coming from a rural set up I lagged so much behind in so many fields like communications and debating power in english , smartness, general knowledge etc and etc I picked up these lines of studies. Famous College-street Book shops were within my walking distance and I started buying old books of my choice , very cheap, to keep me up to the modern smart level of the time. I even soid my blood in 'Blood Bank'of the college, a few times, to get me smartly dressed.
A girl (- Dutta ROY) one year junior to me was the queen- bee of medical college at my time and though she was my dream-girl , she was too smart , too modern and too high in standard and financial level. Mine was only a dream. Once it so happened that we were returning home in 2B Bus( she to Balygunge and my home in Dhakuria).She was sitting on Ladies seat and I was hanging by holding a supporting rod with a load of books/ note bookes . she smiled at me asked for my books to help and I felt,- as if Heaven was not far fron=m my reach ! Soon a seat by her side became vacant and she invited me to seat by her side. The village boy's day-dreaming was full-filled by heaven's approval that day...! Next it happened when I passed my M.B.B.S Exam., was an Intern and we together on duty at Causulty Deptt. She wanted me to teach I.V injection and what more could I ask for in life! But it was the real dream fullfiled when she asked me - how did I learn drawing pictures so good ! and wanted me to teach her drawing sketches . ....!
So, heaven fullfilled my last dream , even! I knew we could never be friends because her smartness and financial status-differrence was too wide for me to close up and I never tried any further. And in six months, I completed my Internship and joined my House-job in IRWIN HOSPITAl , DELHI. and we never saw each other ever since . Maybe, she wont even recognise me if we meet again.And that is what is called - LIFE.
Yes ! thus was my life of child -hood and young days untill 1955 and I was now a young man of 24 or 25 yrs of age , -Young and aspiring to reach some stable base.
I shall never forget my Five year M,B.B.S -course life.When I found that coming from a rural set up I lagged so much behind in so many fields like communications and debating power in english , smartness, general knowledge etc and etc I picked up these lines of studies. Famous College-street Book shops were within my walking distance and I started buying old books of my choice , very cheap, to keep me up to the modern smart level of the time. I even soid my blood in 'Blood Bank'of the college, a few times, to get me smartly dressed.
A girl (- Dutta ROY) one year junior to me was the queen- bee of medical college at my time and though she was my dream-girl , she was too smart , too modern and too high in standard and financial level. Mine was only a dream. Once it so happened that we were returning home in 2B Bus( she to Balygunge and my home in Dhakuria).She was sitting on Ladies seat and I was hanging by holding a supporting rod with a load of books/ note bookes . she smiled at me asked for my books to help and I felt,- as if Heaven was not far fron=m my reach ! Soon a seat by her side became vacant and she invited me to seat by her side. The village boy's day-dreaming was full-filled by heaven's approval that day...! Next it happened when I passed my M.B.B.S Exam., was an Intern and we together on duty at Causulty Deptt. She wanted me to teach I.V injection and what more could I ask for in life! But it was the real dream fullfiled when she asked me - how did I learn drawing pictures so good ! and wanted me to teach her drawing sketches . ....!
So, heaven fullfilled my last dream , even! I knew we could never be friends because her smartness and financial status-differrence was too wide for me to close up and I never tried any further. And in six months, I completed my Internship and joined my House-job in IRWIN HOSPITAl , DELHI. and we never saw each other ever since . Maybe, she wont even recognise me if we meet again.And that is what is called - LIFE.
Yes ! thus was my life of child -hood and young days untill 1955 and I was now a young man of 24 or 25 yrs of age , -Young and aspiring to reach some stable base.
AUTOBIOGRAPHY : FIRST ROUND XXVII
So ,ow I was , by my social standard & the standard of 1949 -Cal cutta , a bright boy; 17-18 yrs of age, and a student of Medical College Calcutta . The front- face pillars of the College building matched,even, the Governors House and I was feeling different with some inflated ego. For the last one year, after I made my promise to improve , I joined physical training in UNIVERSITY INSTITUTE of College Square area, under Monotosh Roy and I was no more that sick & thin boy but a better built standard sized ( ISI )youth . I was openly elated to feel that now I could meet rich and smart Class of Cacutta in my college . All along, before, I never wore a 'English-cut' full pants and was dreaming for my first smart dress. But the dampening effect came when my father took me to a tailor and got me in a pair of khaki-pants ( police type, -of those days). . Any one can well imagine the expression on my face, in that out-fit! I would steal my entry in the class after all the boys and girls were in.. Soon ,in three -four months , I managed to keep up my face and then, the Professor of Anatomy , forced me to believe in mysef by the brilliance of his lecture , so much that neither dress nor length of Degree at the end of a name was important in real- life-story. And he was only M,B,(of his days). The way he taught and lectured, mesmarised me by magic power of his teaching and simaltaneously drew pictures on the huge board with myriad of coloured chalks-pencils magnetised and inspired me so much that I forgot that I was wearing a Khaki- pant and it did not matter if the girls were smiling or whispering discussing my dress. I cared not and tried to draw picture on my note-book copying his drawings and afterwards . Soon the Cartoon-wa paper came out on the wall of the Students Union Office and made me popular and known to all and because of him.
That is that, - with that start and I , the shy boy with my inferiority complex amongst so many smart boys and girls of Medical college , kept up my faith in myself . Then, my cartoon Weekly -the PIBIS weekly - came up on the wall of the college with cartoon- pictures depicting College events and soon every one noticed me with appreciation and even the smart girls . Then onwards my name was PIBI and I won the first round by the begining of the second year in Medical College , Calcutta of 1950.
That is that, - with that start and I , the shy boy with my inferiority complex amongst so many smart boys and girls of Medical college , kept up my faith in myself . Then, my cartoon Weekly -the PIBIS weekly - came up on the wall of the college with cartoon- pictures depicting College events and soon every one noticed me with appreciation and even the smart girls . Then onwards my name was PIBI and I won the first round by the begining of the second year in Medical College , Calcutta of 1950.
AUTOBIOGRAPHY : TEEN-AGE TURN XXVI
After the picture which I don't remember as my mind was not in the show at all but in my planning a respectable RETURN -HOME. It was well in he night when I returned to a neighbouring house and the lady of that house informed my mother and I returned so hungry that my mother knew it by looking at my face and I had a good meal with Hilsa fish purchased again. My father also was no un-happy on my return and the whole episode of Hilsa-loss were forgotten soon.
Then on-ward it was a smooth sail and I was my usual self. Only the result of the first year final saddened me . I could manage to get between 38 t0 40 % (yeary colege xamination. which was held after assurance by college authority that every one woud be given pass mark ) As my poetry was published in the colege Magazine and my Math -teacher liked it, he once teased me and told - 'your poetic talent will not get you through the next Exam ( final)' . That comment put me back on the track and I planned seriousy to regain the lost ground.. This tine I used to go to my friend's house on Circular road where Mirza pur street met . They had a bigger house with extra room and we were good friends. Soon we signed a paper with promise and oath that we won't talk about girls anymore and will be serious in our studies. And one of us used it as a shade and stuck it on the Hurricane lamp ( there was no elctricity in their house). As bad luck had its way, the letter was picked up by my friend's elder sister and she showed it to her mother . So we had some tough time to explain but we wee excused on the basis of the nature of oath and promise. .... Any way ,time went on , the exam was over and I passed I.Sc with First division with letter mark in Maths. Soon my father was again on the field trying to put me every where - Medical , Engineering and even Presidency while I knew the least about what I really wanted to be except my poetry and painting hobby. Finally I was in Medical college , Calcutta ,more by effort of my fathe than my own endeavour.
Then on-ward it was a smooth sail and I was my usual self. Only the result of the first year final saddened me . I could manage to get between 38 t0 40 % (yeary colege xamination. which was held after assurance by college authority that every one woud be given pass mark ) As my poetry was published in the colege Magazine and my Math -teacher liked it, he once teased me and told - 'your poetic talent will not get you through the next Exam ( final)' . That comment put me back on the track and I planned seriousy to regain the lost ground.. This tine I used to go to my friend's house on Circular road where Mirza pur street met . They had a bigger house with extra room and we were good friends. Soon we signed a paper with promise and oath that we won't talk about girls anymore and will be serious in our studies. And one of us used it as a shade and stuck it on the Hurricane lamp ( there was no elctricity in their house). As bad luck had its way, the letter was picked up by my friend's elder sister and she showed it to her mother . So we had some tough time to explain but we wee excused on the basis of the nature of oath and promise. .... Any way ,time went on , the exam was over and I passed I.Sc with First division with letter mark in Maths. Soon my father was again on the field trying to put me every where - Medical , Engineering and even Presidency while I knew the least about what I really wanted to be except my poetry and painting hobby. Finally I was in Medical college , Calcutta ,more by effort of my fathe than my own endeavour.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
AUTOBIGRAPHY; - CINDERELLA-DREAM XXV
So ! I was as happy as in my village life with no strict discipline thurst on me to make me a bound child. My father had his small Boarding House in Delhi and stayed there most of the year. . He was a quick tempered personality and his joy -ous mood with children lasted not more than an hour a day. And just nearing Puja -fest., it happened . He took me to the market to make purchases for some feast, bought a pair of Hilsa fish and gave to me to hold and carry. I was a geneticaly forget-ful boy and within next 10 minutes lost both of them while sitting near some shop .. Soon, while walking with him I suddenly found that my hands were empty - no fish . As I knew his temper and the open-Air beating waitng for me , I ran alone back home managed some cash from my mother's wooden box and decided to 'abscond' to come back never. I walked the whole distance from Sealdah to Governor's house , sat there, rested and then reluctantly bought a 2nd class tram ticket to Bally-gunje area. On the way a great, cinderella -dream popped up in me . I knew I was not that bad-looking and was a first Divisioner( a good record those days. So this was a chance to change my life than going back home and get a good beatting from my father. So I roamed around in Rashbihari area dreaming of my quick change in fate and fortune. After some time, I found a quite handsome (the daughter had to be beautiful too) old gentle man sitting near the gate and reading news paper . I stopped there ,asked for some help. He took quite some time before turning to me and then scanned me like a detective ( i was such a fool!, not even to take off my wrist watch). He then wasted no time to say -" ran away from home ?- But why ?' I was speech -less getting caught so off guard ( such dialogues were not expected in Cinderella story) . I tried to be a bit smart - 'Can you sir help me ? I need some money and somewhere to stay ', This time he looked some what like a stern teacher and told -' boy, go home and be good' and started reading his newspaper.. I stood a few second still and started loosing ground and backed outside . My Cinderella -dream of gaining a foothold and a princess were floating thin like chimney-smoke. I came back to BASU-SREE cinema Hall, bought a ticket with most of the money I had (except the return -fare) and went inside .The picture was already running with deep darkness around and within me.
AUTO -BIOGRAPHY XXIV
I still remember ,in the college, I had only a 30-page exercise book which I could not fill up in three months . In that period of Political and communal turmoil , famine-aftermath, and no-direction-phase, it was the real freedom for teen-age boys like us. I needed only a pair of Chappal and a shirt of any size and a pai-jama for the college and outside too. As there were no girl-friend , I did not need any extra effort to look attractive. I hosted lots and lots of malarial parasite with their regular stage-show , had amoebiasis and other diarrhoeas and so, was slim like a bamoo twig but had no dirth of energy.I attended only 3 or 4 classes a day on average and there was more noise in the class than in the market in front of our college, on Scott Lane.
I told already,- it was the post-Independence period of unrest and we would always be eagar for 'Bande-Ma ta-ram' slogan from any source outside and our student leader woud respond smartly and I would join the 'come out' or 'Get to the street" slogan and procession until the end of Scot Lane and then come back home happy. Our rented two-room space with common toilet and single water tap for two famiies was Rs 30 = per month and we were 6 brothers , one sister, my mother,and grand nother (mother's side) to live in those two rooms with no extra covered veranda of our own. There was no dirth of noise around and great competetion amongst tenants for water and toilet timings. My reading space was the common passage of veranda where the water tap was and I was an eagar boy to win in the game of placing the water bucket under the tap in swift movement.
My other escape-hobby was to slip out in the afternoon to the nearest Cinema hall, PURABEE, about one-third of a mile on Harrison Road ( now M.Gandhi Road) and to peep through the gaping doors and see the running picture as long as I was not noticed and chased away. Thus, after repeated attempts, over days, I could get cut- piece nature of the story and construct the whole picture with the power of my imaginative skill. So the lack of pocket-money could never keep me defeated in my adventure and search for joy.
I told already,- it was the post-Independence period of unrest and we would always be eagar for 'Bande-Ma ta-ram' slogan from any source outside and our student leader woud respond smartly and I would join the 'come out' or 'Get to the street" slogan and procession until the end of Scot Lane and then come back home happy. Our rented two-room space with common toilet and single water tap for two famiies was Rs 30 = per month and we were 6 brothers , one sister, my mother,and grand nother (mother's side) to live in those two rooms with no extra covered veranda of our own. There was no dirth of noise around and great competetion amongst tenants for water and toilet timings. My reading space was the common passage of veranda where the water tap was and I was an eagar boy to win in the game of placing the water bucket under the tap in swift movement.
My other escape-hobby was to slip out in the afternoon to the nearest Cinema hall, PURABEE, about one-third of a mile on Harrison Road ( now M.Gandhi Road) and to peep through the gaping doors and see the running picture as long as I was not noticed and chased away. Thus, after repeated attempts, over days, I could get cut- piece nature of the story and construct the whole picture with the power of my imaginative skill. So the lack of pocket-money could never keep me defeated in my adventure and search for joy.
AUTO BIOGRAPHY : LOSS & GAIN XXIII
Soon I found that my loss i,e the chance to romantic closness to girls were well compensated. I got my happiest time being in Bangabasi College. No ragging - those days , enough crowd in the class to hide from teacher's notice( my section was Y i.e all English aphabets were well utilised by the blessings of Refugee -influx and three colleges - Bangabasi, Surendranath & Vidaya sagar college were nearest to Sealdah Rly station and welcomed all the refugee -boys from outside Calcutta. Those were the days after Independence and partition . Those were the days of communal-kilings and joy of Freedom and like the famous story of 'Tale of two Cities' , it was the best time for us , teen-age-students, and worst time of poitical uncertainty ,migrating suffering and starving refugees ,communal Kiling- games, Scarcity , post-famine starvation and chaotic social divides.
But I was a boy of 15-16 and everything made me happy including riots , as if I was enjoying a 'cock-fight' game everywhere ! Overmore , I was a boy from remote village and was hungry like a baby animal for something to thrive upon.
My college was wonderful with 170 students in my Y-section and the lecturer needed a binocular to find me and that was a great joy or liberty ,against the background of those rural restrictions. And we already formed a team of musical Band to perform Week-end Radio -songs- programme known as 'ANURODHER ASAR'( Feast of Requested songs).
So , now I had no sorrow or sense of loss , losing the chance of being closer to girls of Scottish Church College had no effect on me and really had no time for grief, as I had hundreds of things to know and expeience in the famous Capital city of CALCUTTA.
But I was a boy of 15-16 and everything made me happy including riots , as if I was enjoying a 'cock-fight' game everywhere ! Overmore , I was a boy from remote village and was hungry like a baby animal for something to thrive upon.
My college was wonderful with 170 students in my Y-section and the lecturer needed a binocular to find me and that was a great joy or liberty ,against the background of those rural restrictions. And we already formed a team of musical Band to perform Week-end Radio -songs- programme known as 'ANURODHER ASAR'( Feast of Requested songs).
So , now I had no sorrow or sense of loss , losing the chance of being closer to girls of Scottish Church College had no effect on me and really had no time for grief, as I had hundreds of things to know and expeience in the famous Capital city of CALCUTTA.
AUTOBIOGRAPHY : XXII
My first college life
The rural boy now in a capital city and aspiring for recognition .
It was not easy; nor had. I really had not any aspiration or plan but my father monitored it on me . Though I got a good first Division with even letters marks in 2 or 3 subjects , I did not really want to be anything except enjoying my urban ife . I came from Barisal in july and was late for any ggod college includng Presidency or scottsh church. Now only Banga-basi or Ripon college was wide open for refugee-immigrants.But enchanted by dazzling Calcutta -life, I became suddeny ambitious and romantic and wanted to be in Scottish church college , where , as I learnt , it was Co-education and plenty of beautiful girls from rich class.. All along in my vilage life , I was bound by all types of restrictions . Even if I tried to talk to my cousin-sisters , I would be scolded by seniors ,even six months older . So now with my better result I almost became bold enough in facing my father(he was a leo and every one of us, in family, was like sheep to him) but now I was a village boy with 1st division, to my credit. So wanted to try to be, as what I wanted to be ! The famous prof. of Mathematics in scottish church college was mMdhusudan Sarkar and he was from our district and was known to us through relationship. So I ventured , one day and met him and opened up my desire to be admitted. He listened and then told -' you have good marks but you are late by a month. So get into any college near your home'. But I tried to be persistent with my desire to be in a Scottish Church college. He looked intently at me for a few second then hit me straight -' you want this college becuse there is co-education, which means there are girls ?' He almost hit me between my eyes and I was fumbling for words but was trying to stand the storm . Then he told sharply ' Go home . you are getting to the wrong track. Coming from a remote village , you are already proving yourself a spoilt boy and girls will spoil you more . Go home and get into any college that is still open for you. Nowyou can go.' ....
I dion't know how any one, knocked by Mohammed ali did stand the ground but I could not and was staggarring back home.Next time I was in Bangabasi College and had jolly good time there, enjoying the freedom of college life without competetion or restrictions of school-ife in a village.And - I found myself.
The rural boy now in a capital city and aspiring for recognition .
It was not easy; nor had. I really had not any aspiration or plan but my father monitored it on me . Though I got a good first Division with even letters marks in 2 or 3 subjects , I did not really want to be anything except enjoying my urban ife . I came from Barisal in july and was late for any ggod college includng Presidency or scottsh church. Now only Banga-basi or Ripon college was wide open for refugee-immigrants.But enchanted by dazzling Calcutta -life, I became suddeny ambitious and romantic and wanted to be in Scottish church college , where , as I learnt , it was Co-education and plenty of beautiful girls from rich class.. All along in my vilage life , I was bound by all types of restrictions . Even if I tried to talk to my cousin-sisters , I would be scolded by seniors ,even six months older . So now with my better result I almost became bold enough in facing my father(he was a leo and every one of us, in family, was like sheep to him) but now I was a village boy with 1st division, to my credit. So wanted to try to be, as what I wanted to be ! The famous prof. of Mathematics in scottish church college was mMdhusudan Sarkar and he was from our district and was known to us through relationship. So I ventured , one day and met him and opened up my desire to be admitted. He listened and then told -' you have good marks but you are late by a month. So get into any college near your home'. But I tried to be persistent with my desire to be in a Scottish Church college. He looked intently at me for a few second then hit me straight -' you want this college becuse there is co-education, which means there are girls ?' He almost hit me between my eyes and I was fumbling for words but was trying to stand the storm . Then he told sharply ' Go home . you are getting to the wrong track. Coming from a remote village , you are already proving yourself a spoilt boy and girls will spoil you more . Go home and get into any college that is still open for you. Nowyou can go.' ....
I dion't know how any one, knocked by Mohammed ali did stand the ground but I could not and was staggarring back home.Next time I was in Bangabasi College and had jolly good time there, enjoying the freedom of college life without competetion or restrictions of school-ife in a village.And - I found myself.
Monday, October 4, 2010
AUTOBIPGRAPHY - Back to my past XXI
Now where to make the landing! Soon !- during my Matricuation exam.,approaching ,came the lightning shock that my Country was being divided includung our Bengal! At first , there were rumours and we were hoping against hope that our part of motherland, BARISAl would be saved and we were swinging on the craddle of hope and dream.As told before, 90% of our village population were muslims but we never knew Communal dis-harmony. We joined each other's festivals and ceremonies during Puja days and Muharam or Id. But now with the prospect of 'Freedom !' the picture and environment changed. Even my close muslim class- mates started talking in changed accents.....and we were practising self defense ,with 3-inch knifes and cut-out bamboo-stick.
So !, soon I lost my boyhood with the temptation of 'Freedom' and was growing up fast to face some adverseries about whom I had no clear idea. But it did not matter ;the excitement of facing some enemies of another community( who were almost our relatives,just the other day) inspired me to make bows and arrows and slings . And a long-term sick boy like me felt like a developing fighter and was always planning, with my restless mind and frail malaria -diarrhoeia infested body to meet the approaching enemies ( Like Don Quoxote about whom I read long after and I had no De La Mancha to help me ) but I was Practising very hard.
Once, in earlier time, it happened so , that I was successful in Kiling a sparow in my third or fourth aim and felt so excited and elated that I held it by its wings and ran back home and met my mother on her way back carrying water pitcher , filled up . I could not suppress my joy of such martial success and like a proud son faced her with the hope of great appreciation for my skill(like Arjuna). She put down the pitcher ,looked at the dead bird and then suddenly catching hold on my arm gave me such a hard fist-blow that this aspiring warrior instantly lost his breath, ,my spine arched back and I could only afford a painful and shrill cry. Sad ! and thus the dream of being a potential Alexander or Napolean was nipped in the bud which the growing Century must have lamented much, for the loss.
So !, soon I lost my boyhood with the temptation of 'Freedom' and was growing up fast to face some adverseries about whom I had no clear idea. But it did not matter ;the excitement of facing some enemies of another community( who were almost our relatives,just the other day) inspired me to make bows and arrows and slings . And a long-term sick boy like me felt like a developing fighter and was always planning, with my restless mind and frail malaria -diarrhoeia infested body to meet the approaching enemies ( Like Don Quoxote about whom I read long after and I had no De La Mancha to help me ) but I was Practising very hard.
Once, in earlier time, it happened so , that I was successful in Kiling a sparow in my third or fourth aim and felt so excited and elated that I held it by its wings and ran back home and met my mother on her way back carrying water pitcher , filled up . I could not suppress my joy of such martial success and like a proud son faced her with the hope of great appreciation for my skill(like Arjuna). She put down the pitcher ,looked at the dead bird and then suddenly catching hold on my arm gave me such a hard fist-blow that this aspiring warrior instantly lost his breath, ,my spine arched back and I could only afford a painful and shrill cry. Sad ! and thus the dream of being a potential Alexander or Napolean was nipped in the bud which the growing Century must have lamented much, for the loss.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
FINAL APPEAL ( POETRY ) XX
Open ! - wider, -the SKY
I feel suffocated on this limittimg World !
Let Your Sun and stars shine more or glow
As now, -together
I need - more LIGHT
Let all thy Galaxies join my aaspiring thoughts
to fullfil the final design of my DREAM
Want to feel better in floods of LOVE
to swim or be carried away
to-wards some final dive.
Open up ,then, YOUR Sky or space
I want to know my real shape
Let it ,if it be
for a fractured moment
of Thy Eternal Time and Space.
(Composed on 4th Oct. 'io IST )
I feel suffocated on this limittimg World !
Let Your Sun and stars shine more or glow
As now, -together
I need - more LIGHT
Let all thy Galaxies join my aaspiring thoughts
to fullfil the final design of my DREAM
Want to feel better in floods of LOVE
to swim or be carried away
to-wards some final dive.
Open up ,then, YOUR Sky or space
I want to know my real shape
Let it ,if it be
for a fractured moment
of Thy Eternal Time and Space.
(Composed on 4th Oct. 'io IST )
MY TUOUGHTS & MY THESIS of 1960 XIX
It 1was 1958 when I resigned from my Central Govt. job and accepted Govt. Of India Scholarship for my M.D in Mdicine with special suject Cardiology. I was not yet married and my scholarship was Rs 150/= per month. But I was happy to get the chance to do somthing .The subject of the Thesis itsef satisfied me.. It was " ABO - BLOOD GROUPS IN INDIAN PEOPLE AND THEIR RELATION TO VARIOUS DISEASES " More interesting incidence wss that after completion of the thesis and its acceptaance, I gave up my M.D -study for 3-4 years on personal grounds and I was married then.
But the subject of my thesis satisfied me and my guide (Dr, P.S. Gupta M..D , Reader , Maulana Azad Medical College, Delhi)immensely. And the INTRODUCTION itself will tell it better .
"Why do Certain people suffer from Diseases while others do not ? Is there something inherent in certin persons that render them either more susceptible to certain dieases or less prone to others ? These are the questions older than the History of Medicine itself and yet have not been completely answered",
"Before and during the earliest days of Civiisation, Diseases were accepted as punishment from Heaven for Human faults or failures. But since then, Science and Civiisation have progressed through so many Centuries until the present day when Knowledge has overcome mysteries and even Space and atoms have bowed down to the mastery of SCIENCE. and have uncovered more of their puzzling secrets............ the influences of environment, sex,, age , occupation and heridity in diseases had never been more thoroughly studied before. Yet the mysteries are not all clear.....Though the first half of the Twentieth Century has seen rapid expansion of Science of Genetics, there has not been comparable growth in that branch concerned with Human Inheritence until ABO Blood Groups came into the field "
This is where I left the field of my research by demands of material World in 1960 and after acceptance of my thesis. Since ,I entered a job again and then in 1965 had the lucky chance to get my M.D Degree.
Yet the World did not stand still and Science of Genetics progressed and sped through Dr, Watson & Crick , who finally had the success story of completing the human Genome. Their work and research covered a span of 27 years (1953 - 1980)
But my mind still lingers on the issue of Genetic -link in Causation of Dieases. I proved in one diease - i,e Cancer of Tongue (G,I -Tract)where there was proved statistical significance of the diease in Blood Group A , when, interestingly, Blood group A prevalence in INDIAN people held only 3rd place [ in Delhi i.e 30 % ] !
Whie in U.S.A ( 1993 - 2008 ), I tried to communicate this finding of mine but did not succeed . In western World, Blood Gr- A is more prevalent ( 42 % . in London).There is even , now , the scope of finding this relation of Cancer of GI Tract with Blood group A in Western world. The material for research will be found ready -made ,as in all proved & operated cases the Bood group is estabished in every hospital.
But the subject of my thesis satisfied me and my guide (Dr, P.S. Gupta M..D , Reader , Maulana Azad Medical College, Delhi)immensely. And the INTRODUCTION itself will tell it better .
"Why do Certain people suffer from Diseases while others do not ? Is there something inherent in certin persons that render them either more susceptible to certain dieases or less prone to others ? These are the questions older than the History of Medicine itself and yet have not been completely answered",
"Before and during the earliest days of Civiisation, Diseases were accepted as punishment from Heaven for Human faults or failures. But since then, Science and Civiisation have progressed through so many Centuries until the present day when Knowledge has overcome mysteries and even Space and atoms have bowed down to the mastery of SCIENCE. and have uncovered more of their puzzling secrets............ the influences of environment, sex,, age , occupation and heridity in diseases had never been more thoroughly studied before. Yet the mysteries are not all clear.....Though the first half of the Twentieth Century has seen rapid expansion of Science of Genetics, there has not been comparable growth in that branch concerned with Human Inheritence until ABO Blood Groups came into the field "
This is where I left the field of my research by demands of material World in 1960 and after acceptance of my thesis. Since ,I entered a job again and then in 1965 had the lucky chance to get my M.D Degree.
Yet the World did not stand still and Science of Genetics progressed and sped through Dr, Watson & Crick , who finally had the success story of completing the human Genome. Their work and research covered a span of 27 years (1953 - 1980)
But my mind still lingers on the issue of Genetic -link in Causation of Dieases. I proved in one diease - i,e Cancer of Tongue (G,I -Tract)where there was proved statistical significance of the diease in Blood Group A , when, interestingly, Blood group A prevalence in INDIAN people held only 3rd place [ in Delhi i.e 30 % ] !
Whie in U.S.A ( 1993 - 2008 ), I tried to communicate this finding of mine but did not succeed . In western World, Blood Gr- A is more prevalent ( 42 % . in London).There is even , now , the scope of finding this relation of Cancer of GI Tract with Blood group A in Western world. The material for research will be found ready -made ,as in all proved & operated cases the Bood group is estabished in every hospital.
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